Matthew's Animals
 The Best Place to Look for Animals Online

Jokes About Animals

Haha! my jokes are soo funny! haha! This will make your family burst like a hot air balloon into laughter.
1. Q:What do you call a naughty cow?  A: A bully.
2. Q:Why did the anteater get stuck in the spaceship? A: To see some termites.
3. Q:Change g in goose and what do you get? A: A moose.
4. Q:What sound does a skunk-dog make? A: Whiff-Whiff.
5. Q:Why can't ostriches fly? A: Because they don't have a flyving licence.
6 Q: How do you get an elephant into a car? A: take the back seats out.
7 Q: How do you get a zebra into a car? A: get the elephant out.
8: Q: What animal do you wear? A: a badg-er.
9: Q: What does it say here? whalewhale, whale drive plane. A: Blue Whale, Grey Whale, Pilot Whale.
10: Q: How do you weigh the world's heaviest, biggest, fattest fish? A: Scales.
11: Q: What do you call the world's Fattest, Biggest, Longest, Heaviest, Most Aggresive, Scariest, Tallest Whale? A: What's the porpoise?
12: Q: Odd one out? Wolf, Whale, Walrus, Wombat? A: Wombat. all others have 'l'.
13: Q: Where did the kangaroo go on holiday?  A: Koala Lumpur.
14: Q: Why didn't the T-rex cross the road? A: There were none.
15: Q: Three birds. A toucan and a parrot. What comes next? A: A multicoloured toucan.
16: NOTE This is a joke without a question and answer.: An officer asked: "What goes up the mountain with six legs, and down with three". If he knew the answer, he would get £1000,000,000. He thought, "A hungry bear and a man go looking with food together, but takes years to get down the mountain. When they got down the mountain, years later, the bear died of old age and the man was elderly."
Matthew's Animals © Matthew von Wenden, 2015-2019.